Move Over, Saddam: Now It’s Iran.

Next time you hear about the “Iranian nuclear threat,” put on your tinfoil hat, pour yourself some coffee, and get ready for the show. The stage is set, the actors are the same, only the props have changed—now it’s drones, sanctions, and ritual strikes on military sites. And in the audience, as always, are we—the viewers, taxpayers, and future conscripts.

Act I: “He’s Almost Got the Bomb!”

For 20 years, Iran has been “on the verge of developing nuclear weapons.” But alas, every time it’s about to blow up—there’s an IAEA report. Every report says, “just a little more and they’ll definitely do it.” The same faces in Washington and Tel Aviv, the same wording as with “Iraqi weapons of mass destruction”—which also didn’t exist, but “posed a threat.”

Moral: Even if Iran does nothing, it can still be accused. The main thing is to set up the cameras and the background just right.

Act II: Israel—Small, Nuclear, and Nervous

Israel is the only country in the region with real nuclear weapons. But no one talks about that. Because it’s awkward: how do you explain that the one with the bomb is hitting the one without it—but who might have it?

Israel bombs Syria, Lebanon, and now Iran—while shouting, “They want to destroy us!” It’s like a bodybuilder beating up a guy in glasses at the gym and yelling, “He might pull a knife!”

Act III: The U.S.—The Kind Global Papa Carlo

America, as always, arrives with humanitarian aid… in the form of an aircraft carrier, drone, and sanctions. Support for Israel? Unconditional. Military hardware? American. The arguments go something like this:

“We must defend democracy!” (Translation: “We’ve got an ally, a base, and oil nearby—don’t interfere.”)

Act IV: Europe Sips Tea and Pretends It’s Not Their Problem

The EU does exactly what it’s told from across the ocean. First—a statement of “deep concern,” then sanctions against Iran, then new arms shipments to Israel. Meanwhile—silence about the Hague, about refugees, about the oil shock.

Inflation in Germany? Oh, that’s Iran’s fault.
Migrants in Italy? Of course, it’s Hamas.

Act V: What About Us, Ordinary Mortals?

• Gasoline at €2.5? Sorry, Iran did something again.

• Conscription? Relax, these are just “drills,” not mobilization.

• Taxes? We’ll raise them—for democracy, after all.

• Internet shutdown? If you think too much—yes.

Finale: Who Will Be the Scapegoat This Time?

The correct answer: all of us.
Because what’s happening now isn’t a battle of good versus evil, but a struggle for control, oil, and order in someone’s global pocket.
We’ll get slogans, be shown scary footage, and be told, “It’s for peace.” And we’ll pay again—with gas, taxes, fears, and silence.

P.S.

If you suddenly hear in the news, “Iran has crossed the red line”—consider it a script. Not for life. For a new war.