Austria Wins Eurovision 2025 — Because Love Is "Wasted" Again
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JJ performed ninth, sang about wasted love, and scored points from the jury, viewers, and everyone who’s ever texted at night “you didn’t reply, but I still love you”
That’s it: Eurovision 2025 has wrapped up, the fireworks have faded, and the national costumes are off to the dry cleaners. The winner is Austria’s JJ with the song "Wasted Love." Yes, that very song that managed to fit everything into three minutes: pain, synthesizer, and memories of messages that never got a reply.
JJ performed ninth — and apparently, nine was lucky again: ninth track, ninth stage of breakup acceptance, ninth year in a row when Eurovision is less a song contest and more glittery psychotherapy.
While rivals were jumping, splitting lasers, and dancing in front of LED dragons, JJ just came out, sang, and hit Europe’s collective nerve. Voilà — victory. No balalaika needed.
According to eyewitnesses (and Twitter commentators), the song was perfect for solo evening wine and falling apart to tracks from the “Heartbreak ’25” playlist.
💬 Winner JJ comments:
“I just sang what my ‘Sent at 2:47 — unread’ card was screaming.
If I’d known so much pain would bring victory — I’d have suffered sooner.”
JJ also thanked his mom, Spotify, and his ex, “who inspired the chorus but didn’t deserve a verse.”
🌍 Fan and Internet Reaction:
Twitter: “JJ won, and my ex still hasn’t apologized. The world’s unfair, but the song is 🔥.”
Instagram: “This song feels like it read my DMs from 2022.”
Reddit: “Wasted Love? That’s what I called my Binance account…”
TikTok: trend: pouring wine, staring out the window, and deleting the contact ‘Sergey 💔’ to JJ’s song.
🎤 And the competitors?
Sweden: “He just caught the vibe. We tried, but our track was way too happy.”
Spain: “Next year we’ll perform a ballad about mortgages — that should work.”
Israel: “We had a song about hope, peace, and inner strength, but apparently we should’ve sung about an empty fridge and an ex from Vienna. We’ll take notes. Next year — only tears, minor chords, and a candle in the background.”
Host from Italy: “JJ sang about heartbreak, and Europe said in unison: ‘Bro, here’s the trophy.’”
Parmegano
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